Homes for sale college park ga

Hello, I'll try my best to keep this concise but as informative as possible.
Ok, so I sold my 28 year old, 180,xxx mile car online (Facebook Marketplace) to a buyer who purchased the car sight unseen. I had sent the buyer around 20 high quality images, showing imperfections and key details, the sort of thing that you would expect when buying a car. I also had sent the buyer an informative description of the vehicle, including work that had been carried out in my ownership, as well as work that would need doing in the future. I also stated that the vehicle was my only vehicle and I had been using it for commuting and social needs, I had also included a reason for sale which was the economic cost of running, insuring and taxing the car (3.0 litre petrol automatic, getting around 20mpg).
The seller and I had back and forth conversation, he was happy to buy the car based on the images and description and that he would arrange a vehicle transport truck to come and collect the vehicle. I recommend that he viewed it in person but he insisted that it was too far away (4 hours), I travelled 6 hours when I bought the car initially. He bartered the price down 3 times in total from beginning to end and had excuses 2 weeks in a row as to why he couldn't afford the car yet. I was in no rush to sell so I was happy to wait.
Eventually, he arranged for a transport truck to collect the car and at the same time I had put down a deposit on a new car so I was wanting it gone ASAP. At this point he asked me to get the car MOT tested, I told him it would be a task to find somewhere to test it on such short notice (3 days) before my insurance would be cancelled as I had already scheduled. It still had 2 months MOT left on it at the time, however I obligated and found a garage to test it on such short notice (the same day the insurance was ending). It passed the MOT test with some advisories but nothing major and I had also informed him beforehand that it may fail on a suspension ball joint (was only an advisory in the end). Straight after the MOT test I parked the car on my driveway and did not move it, as the day after I collected my new vehicle. About 2 weeks later when the transport truck finally collected the car, I loaded it onto the truck and received the payment from the buyer via bank transfer and at this point assumed the sale was done and that would be it.
The day after, the buyer received the car and immediately claimed it was in limp home mode as soon as he took it for a drive. He supposedly took it to a garage and had the code cleared within 30 minutes and claimed that it cost him £60 to fix. To me this seemed fishy as I know a bit about these vehicles due to their niche following (the car does not have a conventional OBD II plug for code/ECU scanning, it requires a specific diagnostic tool which I wouldn't expect many garages to carry unless they were a specialist or main dealer), so didn't believe this when he told me. I immediately responded telling him that does not seem right at all considering the car hadn't moved since the MOT test and ran without any problems beforehand, nor had the MOT tester informed me of any limp mode/running issues after the test, I also believe it would have not passed the test on the emmisions segment if the vehicle could not reach sufficient revs for the emmisions test.
After all this he told me he was "60 quid lighter", I opened the message and didn't respond. About a month later I received another message which I chose to ignore. But after reading it at a later date, he claimed that the car had been sitting in his yard for a month and that the car would not engage reverse gear (automatic gearbox) and that the car supposedly was suffering with head gasket failure. He has not sent me a single piece of evidence to back this.
After speaking to family members and friends about the whole situation after the limp mode part, everyone I spoke to told me to avoid and block this guy due to him probably trying to get whatever money he can out of me. He then sent me another message around a week after that informing me that he was taking me to small claims court. In his message I believe he was also trying to guilt trip me into paying out moeny to him and that I should be ashamed of myself for supposedly scamming someone who has stage 3 kidney disease which according to him is terminal and that he's dying from it (I researched this and stage 3 is not terminal, only stage 5).
I have since received a letter from the courts in regards to a small claims case, which I have responded to the claimant and it is now being taken to Mediation (next week) as I believe the case can be dealt with without the need of a judge or an actual court hearing. The buyer however, does not agree with this and feels it needs a judge's verdict. He is claiming the cost of the vehicle, and cost of diagnosis.
I have also spoken to citizens advice, who transferred/informed to contact consumers advice. They informed me that the only potential case the buyer has against me is the Consumer Rights Act 2015 (if my description of the vehicle does not match what the vehicle really is, for example me claiming on the advert that the car was only on 120,000 miles opposed to 180,000). My friends also informed me that this was a Private vehicle sale and that legally I have no obligation to assist or reimburse the seller if a problem occurs after the sale, for which in the beginning I made some effort to atleast respond to him.
I understand that this is short notice with my mediation being 1 week away and with this already in the courts hands, but I would like to hear people's opinions on whether I should prepare for this to go to court or if the mediator will hear this and deem it unnecessary due to it being a private sale and the issues occuring after purchase.
Thank you in advance for any help, I will try my best to respond but will be a little slow due to being on holiday currently.

I need some advice or tips for responding to the supplemental diversity question. I've worked as a PCT in a heart hospital with patients from various socioeconomic classes, educational backgrounds, and in general an underserved community. I also have worked in a nursing home during college and a MA at a neuro clinic (currently). Is the best way to approach this describing what I've seen and done or talk about what I've learned/ how it has prepared me? Any advice is appreciated! TIA :)

I'm back with another VRM post. The end game is here, and profits are abound!
TL:DR- Price action shows short side has gotten their fill and are systematically covering. Limited institutional investors and retail investors caught with high cost-basis can add to a violent upswing back to fair valuation. With Carvana claiming to have solved profitability it will bode well for Vroom who was focusing on rightsizing earlier and will likely be a tortoise/hare story.
If you believe in online car buying, investing in Vroom long term can be a 50x stock over the next 5-7 years.
Core concept: If online car buying is here to stay then Vroom has the potential to be a major player in a 900 billion dollar industry.
I wanted a very specific car when I was younger and I could not afford a new car. I found that car across the country and bought it sight unseen and had it shipped from CA to VA. That was in 2005.
I have friends who are deathly afraid of the car buying process and want nothing to do with it. Anecdotally the younger generations are becoming more inclined towards digital transactions.
For these reasons I believe that online car buying is here to stay and will slowly grow into a sizeable market. It may seem incredibly simple, but sometimes the most powerful ideas are just that.

1. Intro and History

Vroom specializes in buying and selling cars online. They were founded in 2012 and the IPO was in 2020 @$22/Share. Between 2020 and 2021 it they decided to bet the house on revenue growth. Now whether they thought they could outgrow their cash burn, or the executive team wanted to juice the stock price will never be known. Vroom proceeded to sell convertible notes for 600mm at .75% interest. They used that money to overpay on cars to grow inventory and revenue. Unfortunately they were not able to capitalize on any economies of scale and therefore most of the revenue was essentially wasted.
In 2022 a new CEO was introduced- Tom Shortt. Tom comes from Walmart and Home Depot and was involved in growing e-commerce. So it seems he has the pedigree and the know-how. He decided to “purposefully slow revenue” to fix the operational hurdles that lie in the path to profitability. In the past year they have done just that. Quarter over quarter the revenue shrank while EBITDA loss improved with operational fixes coming online and right sizing underway.
Last earnings call was pretty key because they put a line in the sand on the shrinking of revenue. Incredibly they shrank from 934mm revenue in a quarter to just over 200mm last quarter, however the EBITDA loss improved from -121mm to -53mm, which was their best EBITDA number in over 2 years. I know, low bar sucker, they are still losing insane amounts of cash. Agreed, and there is some risk there. Below I’ll go into detail and explain why the tides can turn oh so quick on this poor beaten down and forgotten stock. Back to the line in the sand- last quarter Tom said that they expect January to be the trough in unit sales. This is key because it indicates they have completed most of the right sizing and will start to grow revenue again.
The big question is can they become a profitable company before they run out of money? Last earnings they said they expect to have 150-200mm in cash at the end of the year. That is a bit concerning if you are currently burning 50mm per quarter. That means by end-24’ they need to raise cash which would be fairly difficult and potentially debilitating in this credit environment. On the other hand that is a fair bit of runway and a lot can happen.
BUT- if they control expenses further and have some tailwinds they can prove out the model and then the question is not can they survive but how much of the 900 BILLION dollar industry they can grow into.
My Previous post goes into a lot of detail, so I will try to keep this post to what has changed, and what potential outcomes are on the table.

1. Company Landscape

Valuation and Price Action- Detail is in my previous post- Highlights are that the current price is far below book value ($2.90) with the caveat that most of value is cash reserves so as they burn down their runway so does the book value. The presents a catch-22 in the buyout potential explained below. Even with a near 0 or negative book value, if they have shown profit the stock price will be much higher as the market is forward looking. The core valuation stays the same to me: If online buying is here to stay and it is confirmed to be a profitable model, then this is worth much more than the current price.
Price action wise with volume dying out completely there is really no weight you can put behind the price action. 900k shares traded at .80 cents is simply noise. That won’t stop the short side from taking advantage of that and try to squeeze as much out of it as possible. One event to note is that the chairman bought 500k shares, adding to his existing 300k shares a couple weeks ago. This was the first insider buy in about 2 years.
Financially- Some impactful updates: 1) While the executive team has executed the turnaround plan fairly well, the runway starts to become a concern in the medium term and could open up some downside outcomes. Even with that impact if the core concept stays true a short term cash concern is a small hurdle. Most importantly Vroom decided to take a portion of their runway and pay down the 600m notes. Vroom was able to pay off 235m of debt for around 40m. Not only does that improve the potential upside but it signals that the cash runway may not be a concern to the management team.
Growth- One thought that might be concerning is the time it will take to ramp revenue back up, especially with magnitude of backtracking. The key is to remember that the used car industry is unique in that each induvial SKU is unique and brings in a different type of consumer. This has its diminishing returns as a company gets larger, but VRM is far from that point. That is how they grew revenue so quickly before. To be clear I do NOT expect the new more responsible CEO to ramp revenue that quickly, but it will be faster than one would expect from traditional industries.
Some underlying signs of grow- Inventory has been growing since May and job openings for service sector positions has increased considerably.

1. Short Side – This recent (since 2021) explosion of interest in short sellers had a whirlwind of misinformation and I unfortunately had to learn from my failures. Fortunately I only buy shares and not options so as long as I believe in the company patience will be rewarded.

I learned that highly shorted stocks rarely mean a squeeze and likely mean further downside. When a stock shows 0 shares available to short that was touted as a sign a squeeze is imminent when in fact it was that the short side is so sure they are insatiable.
What I see now is systematic covering since volume died on March 20th. And with a very small institutional investor (27.5%) base there is a potential for an upwards spiral. Meaning it won’t squeeze but buy pressure will stay consistent until there is a signal not to. On the off chance there is a heavy retail inflow that are unexpected and there could be a swell. I am personally not betting on that, but is entirely feasible.

1. Potential Outcomes- What I like about this setup is that the potential outcomes are clear so you can place an investment accordingly.

Downside- A potential medium term downside is needing to raise cash to continue operations. For this to happen they would need to keep the current loss of 50mm per quarter through mid 2024. With the SG&A picture I find that to be an unlikely scenario. Inventory on Vroom has turned from shrinking to growing and has been consistently growing since May. Management has also said that SGA improvements are not done.
Downside- Bankruptcy- I see this as a no chance scenario. The company has been around for quite some time and has put down big roots. Yes the valuation started too high, got even higher, and was decimated, but bankruptcy is a long way from that price action. With the infrastructure they have there will be a capital solution so they can continue operations and reach profit.
Upside- Buyout – This is an interesting outcome, but as time passes becomes increasingly less attractive because of the cash burn. For example, Carvana could acquire Vroom tomorrow for $3-5 a share and it would be next to nothing if not free. That’s because CVNA could take the cash and apply it to their expensive 10% notes, take on the debt which is nothing in comparison to theirs, and then get all the infrastructure and inventory for pennies. AN and KMX could be players as well depending on how valuable the internal tech stack is to those companies. They have terrible online presence and each has expressed a want to create full Omni channels.
Upside- Profit and Beyond- Last earnings call an analyst claimed that his math shows that VRM needs to double unit sales to get to break even. The management team agreed and followed up with confirmation that there would be no need for additional CAPEX to scale to well beyond those unit sales numbers.
So what does that mean for an investor? What is the true potential upside? Well if break even is at 400m revenue per quarter (1.6bn per year) Vroom could easily be valued 1x revenue, which would put the price at around $11.50 per share and it’s not even a high valuation. While that sounds like a ludicrous and pumping statement, look at how small the moves have been recently. A forgotten stock is a short sellers dream.
I’ll finish by trying to sum up this whole post: If you believe in online car buying, investing in Vroom long term will be a 50x stock over the next 5-7 years.

AITA For telling my best friend I didn't like his girlfriend?
Me and my best friend have been friends for a long time. Since elementary school even. We ended up going to college together and decided we would finally room together our senior year as everything worked out for it. It was planned for us to finally start hanging out together at home since school kept us so busy the previous years we didn't really see each other. Well summer before our senior year he found a girlfriend that wasn't that bad at first. Then after a while when we lived together she start taking him away all the time and would fight with him any time he was away from her. So this meant he was now gone all the time and never home when I thought we would be hanging out more during our senior year. She had some nasty things to say and I've even been there with him while he was on the phone with her. She would cuss him out and yell at him just cause he mentioned wanting to hang out with some of his other friends for a bit. Especially if a girl was involved. She would tell him that her ex thought he was terrible just to let him know she was talking to him again. I heard her cuss at him about his religion. She even fought with him the night of my then girlfriends birthday when we all were hanging out as a group cause she wanted to be alone with him. Fast forward to after college and we ended up not to far from each other but covid hit. She was ok with him coming over as long as we only hung out outside on my patio and whatever we do we aren't inside. We did this for a while but I started getting noise complaints so I told him not to come back over till she was ok with us hanging out inside where I wouldn't get in trouble with my apartment. He then stopped talking to me after that. I told him a couple times since I heard her cuss him out in college to then about how I don't think she is right for him and I didn't like her and how she treated him. I feel as his long time best friend I needed to be the one to do this as it coming from anyone else would've been from someone who didn't know him as well as I did. We went from being such best friends that we promised to each other to be the best man at each others weddings to me not even getting an invite to his. All of our other mutual friends have talked to me about how he has pushed them out of his life and wondered if I knew anything cause we use to be so close. I'm glad he's doing well and he has a life with someone he loves but AITA for telling him my true thoughts about his now wife?

I can only imagine what it would be like to find an incredible woman on here, on my birthday! I have overcome steeper odds, so if you are interested, please read on and inquire within on my journey!
BLUF (Bottom Line Up Front): Stats and Interests Below the Cut-Line. Rationale and Compatibility Analysis Directly Below.
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I am seeking monogamy and commitment from one lady and I am willing to show the same. Currently located in Northern Virginia, but will undoubtedly re-locate due to my career within the next 18 months or so.
I think that the only reasons we might not be compatible are preferences for looks, our careers (especially me in the Navy), sexual compatibility, and how we spend our free time. As for other reasons- I pride myself in communication, problem solving, patience, chivalry, authenticity, and being altruistic.
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Statistics: 6’2, Soon to be 36 YO, 196 lbs, 34 waist, Pulse 52, BP 118/72, Shoe- 12, xxx-7.25, Credit Score 807. Foster Homes Lived In-28, Schools Attended- 23. 43 countries visited, Deployments (USN)- 5, Kids- 0. Black Hair, Hazel Eyes, Lean-Athletic Muscular build. Sweet smile, great calves, aging grey temples, youthful/positive face. The usually response I get is either “fuck yes” or “fuck no” - I realize I am not everyone’s type. 5k PR: 1557- college. Mile-4:17- high school (RI all-state). Undergrad: USNA. Master’s: GWU, USNWC
Red Flags 2 Marriages, 1 other Engagement. Broken hearts- many. Times broken-hearted- 2. Currently separated (Divorce Final-October, no intentions to reconcile). Introverted and Calculated decision maker due to upbringing. Analytical for good and bad reasons. Harry Potter House Ravenclaw Hat-Stall to Slytherin. Left-Handed, 800M SAT Score. Have won over 600k lifetime gambling (A hobby now, used to be a matter of life/death when I was youngehomeless as a teen).
Personality Assessment: Altruistic and Thoughtful people-pleaser. Detail-oriented and sexually charged gentleman. More cooperative and curious than critical. Constantly self-assessing and self-correcting, reflective and strives for improvement. Aims to use own experience to better others in close proximity and to scale. INTJ, love languages physical touch and quality time. Future POTUS, RI GOV, or Government SES, Navy Ship Captain. Vulnerability, Passion, and Compassion are Hallmarks (See Brene Brown/Esther Perel TED Talks).
Interests: Sports fanatic- specifically Boston teams. Board/Card games. Intellectual/Philosophical conversations. Human Behavior, Running, Walking, Pokémon Go, improving my teams around me, including family. Road trips, traveling- especially San Diego, Miami, Vegas, NYC, the beach, kissing, giving massages, finding a partner who wants to deeply connect romantically and physically and discuss and act out our fantasies. Improving our EQ and erotic intelligence together.
Someone will really like this and I hope if you are interested, we could write our success story here. I am an eternal optimist and I realize that you can’t small talk on apps the way I would really like to get to the heart of serious issues. If you are genuinely ambitious yet humble from our beginnings- maybe one of us is the First Spouse to the other, or, the half of a great partnership and earn the title of best parent, or co-chefs in our house together. Coach of the kids’s sports team is cool, too.
I have almost all the pieces I have to make life great and for me it is- just hoping to find that force multiplier where we can enhance our lives and take each other to a place of leadership and bliss that not even we can imagine right now!

This is probably going to be super long and all over the place (update: it was, I have severe ADHD so I apologize), but I just need to get it all out and hear from people who get it. This is one of those things you can't talk about. The only person who knows how bad it is is my grandma.
Anyways, I live with my mom. I'm 22, just graduated college and had a nice respite for the last five years living in dorm with easy access to food, proper living conditions, etc. Obviously that's in the past now and I'm stuck here until I can make enough to move out, but I want to help fix things before I do. While my mom has her weaknesses, she has had an incredibly difficult live and has faced so much abuse and discrimination. She only keeps going because of me, and frankly, I don't even know how she manages that.
As far as the actual situation- I say low-level hoarding but it's always been a pretty substantial thing. I'm probably discounting it. Better than it used to be and my mom is more willing to get rid of stuff, but we still have too much. She banks so much on having yard sales, which I don't think are worth it because of the energy and effort they take, especially because my mom is physically disabled. But being poor is the real kicker and what makes the whole situation so awful. Since my mom is disabled (which has also contributed throughout the years to the house not being so great) she gets SSI which only pays about $900 a month.
That being said, it's gotten to the point where multiple utilities don't work, the worst being the water. It's not because of the hoarding though, it's because we don't have the money to fix it and there's no assistance available (more on that later). The water stopped working because of something with our well, and we don't have the money to fix it. That's been the case for three years, and even when she did finally save up enough to put up, the guy said he couldn't fix it and he'd have to do something else that we'd have to pay more for, and was just really unscrupulous about the whole thing. Even being disabled, my mom is actually a pretty adept handyman and knows a lot of things that people don't realize, especially because she's 5 foot and incredibly outgoing, to the point of almost childishness sometimes. But she can be very professional when necessary. So no running water which makes cleaning incredibly difficult so it just kind of...stopped happening. Luckily my grandma lives on the next street over so we take showers and fill up water jugs over there to flush the toilet (the thing I hate most about our house) and take showers occasionally. Often I'll walk over to my grandma's if I have to go somewhere and my mom's not scheduled to take a shower that day, to save the gas. I hate that I have to do that, but I try to stay positive and tell myself at least I'm being active, because I don't otherwise. More on that later. Our HVAC system went out four years ago because a raccoon got into the duct work. HVAC work costs thousands of dollars. There's still a raccoon up there, they come and go. This past winter was the worst we've had. We have a few radiators and some space heaters, but we had extremely low temperatures for a few days that left our house only about 30°. That was really hard. Usually it's not too bad and we can bundle up and be alright enough. Summers however are a different story. We have some fans and window A/C units, but our house regularly gets to 80-85° and it's often hotter in my room than what the thermostat says in the hall.
We have food stamps, but they've cut them since I've graduated. We don't get much now and I already have an incredibly difficult time with food and food choices because I have severe ADHD and executive functioning issues (hence why it took me five years to graduate college) along with autism and sensory issues. Our kitchen is barely accessible. We haven't used our stove and oven since I don't know when, probably when I was in middle school. Part of it was my mom always said she didn't like using the oven because it made the house hot which required more A/C and therefore a higher energy bill, but also I think it was an energy/spoons (in the disability sense) thing. Everything pretty much after elementary school has always been microwave meals of my own accord. We never really had actual meals in the traditional sense, the closest we got was when my mom would make the microwave chicken parmesan with some mashed potatoes and corn or green beans (still all microwave) or chicken nuggets and french fries (when she'd pull out the fryer). I want (and need) to eat healthier but because of my executive dysfunction I gravitate towards what has the least barriers (physically and mentally in this case). Having less money also makes it incredibly difficult and because of my ADHD whenever I try to eat fruits and vegetables they expire before I finish them. We have to balance on paint cans to get to the fridge and microwave. I'm afraid I'm going to hurt myself, or worse my mom is going to hurt herself. She'll often offer to make my food since it's so difficult to get in there.
Because of my executive dysfunction, it's already difficult for me to fully take care of myself under more optimal circumstances, and even more so being at home. All I do is lay in bed, or if I wanted I could go watch a movie or something with my mom in the living room on the one chair we actually have access to. Could also go outside, but then I'd probably sweat and have to go walk to take a shower. I use Colgate Wisps (disposable waterless brushes) to brush my teeth, I could use the water from the jugs but because of the extra effort, I'll end up just not brushing my teeth. Even with the Wisps I often forget.
Assistance? Nonexistent. We get assistance with the electric bill but that only comes like once a year and honestly that just keeps us from getting disconnected. Utility assistance? Not anymore! The Habitat for Humanity for our county closed and such other programs also either closed or just don't exist. Other counties won't help because we're out of county.
I just want to start working already (I just accepted a teaching position a few days ago!!) so I can help put money towards fixing stuff and making it better. I'll be making more money than anyone in my family has made in years, and really salary wise since my great-grandpa (my mom just worked exorbitant amounts of overtime when I was a kid before she became disabled so maybe comparable). I'm so excited and ready to break the cycle of poverty and have the life I've always wanted. I know it's not my responsibility to put my money towards the repairs, and I don't think my mom wants me to, but I want to. She deserves it and it's a quality of life thing for me too.
Anyways, sorry for the dump. Man it felt good to get that off my chest. That's not even all of it, but that's most of it. I doubt anyone will read all of this but if anyone does, thanks so much, I seriously appreciate it. Sending love to all the COH out there dealing with these unspoken battles ❤️

I’m a Member of Parliament in a small country in Europe. I am in my late twenties, I have a Master’s degree & I first ran for office in late 2019. So, I’ve been doing this for about 3.5 years now, with ~2 years left until the end of my mandate. Before this, I had one full-time job in sales/marketing (which I got right out of college & where I worked for 2 years). So, my CV looks like this: internships/summer jobs during college, 2 years in sales/marketing, and then politics.
Although I was initially excited about this role, I realized there isn’t much I can do to make a change, and I feel like I don’t fit in at all in these circles. I feel like being in politics has killed my spirit. I have no motivation to do this, I kinda just do it cuz I committed to it & don’t want to seem ungrateful to my political party who helped me get to where I am (politically). I desperately want to go back to a career in the private sector, but I feel like I may have killed my chances at a good job because of my political involvement, both because I am now known for my political views & because of my “gap” in my resume. Technically there is no gap, but I feel like employers may not consider my being an MP as a “real job” experience.
Do you think I have a chance to get back to building a career in the private sector without starting from scratch? Like I said, I am in my late twenties & don’t know if I am willing to go through internships & entry level jobs again.
By the way, I am also able to work part-time while being an MP, but I can’t get myself to apply to jobs because of fear of failure. I don’t even know what kind of a career I can have at this point. Help!

So, this is a sticky situation, and I need some perspective.
I recently purchased a BEAUTIFUL twin home built in 1915 with the intention of renting it to my brother and his family. They have 2 young children. The neighborhood is perfect, and all of the neighbors have been friendly and welcoming. It's been a dream purchase in a historic neighborhood where nothing is ever for sale. So when this home came on the market, I purchased it in cash with only a radon and insect inspection, which it passed with flying colors.
Now... here is where it gets interesting. The sellers of the home actually live in the other half of this twin. Under the same roof. So I was willing to give a little more benefit of the doubt due to the fact that they have lived there for 20 years and would obviously have kept the rental unit in good shape, after all they share a wall with it. Right?
The disclosure had a few small items... some mold remediation in 2012 (fine), and some flashing had been repaired on the roof last year. The roof was supposedly replaced in 2012.
Elsewhere on the disclosure:

• Any knowledge of defects with the stucco? NO
• Any knowledge of defect with water intrusion anywhere in the home? NO
• Any knowledge of knob and tube wiring? NO
• When was the last time the chimneys were cleaned? 2022

So, in this market, I bit the bullet based on how clean the disclosure was, having met the sellers and seeing them as a good, honest family with kids... very disarming.
Fast forward to 3 days before closing... I get a call from my agent that after the previous night's rain, there was some water in the kitchen that had come in through the hood vent over the stove. They'd have a roofer over to take a look and get back to me with a solution ASAP. Ok. No reason to panic.
The sellers came back with "the vent cap was too large and there was some backsplash coming back in through it, so we had our roofer replace it with the right size cap. Problem solved." Ok. No reason not to move forward.
The morning of the closing, we did a walk-thru and everything looked fine. Again, no reason not to proceed. So we did. The sellers wrote us a wonderful letter saying how happy they were to sell to such a great family and that they wished us happiness with the home. So nice.
A week later, I brought in some carpenters i've known forever who do amazing work on my home - I trust them implicitly. I asked them to take down the kitchen cabinets so that we could put in new ones, as these were a bit dated. No problem. One wall of cabinets came down without issue. But then, when they took down the cabinets affixed to the outside wall, there is was. A wet, horrifying stew of disintegrated wallboard, black mold, and the kind of smell that makes you want to vomit, if you havent already. It was BAD. So I told the guys, document it and rip it out. This is a serious issue and has to be remediated the right way. Immediately. There are kids living next door.
So upon doing that, over the next 2 days we discovered that the roof had been leaking for years. NOT from a vent cap. From stucco that had been badly patched and holes simply filled with caulk... the walls were never repaired. There were signs of repeated painting, and even fresh plywood laid in the bottoms of the cabinets so that no one would see that the bottoms of the cabinets were rotted through. It was clear the sellers not only knew about this problem, they actively tried to cover it up. And said NO to any knowledge of anything like this on the disclosure.
Now, a day later, a contractor working down the street popped over to say he was surprised that the cheap bastard was actually fixing things. We all froze. The seller actually solicited a bid to fix this? OH YEAH.. this guy tells us. He did, and then he said i was too expensive and he just needed me to patch it and paint it. He told us he refused because this was a structural issue that needed to be fixed.
THEN, the next day, I decided to reach out to the woman who lived in the unit prior to the sellers listing it. She went on an absolute rant about how there were always severe water and mold issues everywhere they they would band aid and never fix. She finally moved out because they were all so sick from the mold.
NOW... I know the burden of proof is high to prove that sellers willfully omitted material defects from a disclosure and deliberately lied. And concealed. The contractor cant find the estimate he gave the seller but he can attest to many conversations he had with him about it.
Have I met this burden? An attorney has told me I have, but what would. you do in this situation, KNOWING your family has to live here next to these clowns once the repairs are made?
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This is gonna be a long one so there’s gonna be a tldr at the top
TLDR I can’t relate to people of my age because I physically can’t do those things and missed out on so much and it makes me wanna cut so fucking bad.
So for context I’m a 17 year old guy whose bounced around the care system from the age of 6. The reasons I won’t get into right here and now because it will only make it worse. When I was born my birth was difficult for my mum and she needed a c section. She suffered from post natal depression after my birth which led to drug use and my dad was a fan of a more hands on approach with his gf (my mum) and his kids to the point I ended up in hospital cause he cracked my head open by pushing me down from the top of the stairs and there was a screw at the bottom.
Because of these things and bouncing around the care system I never really made friends and struggle to trust anyone as well as blaming myself for everything and I blame myself for the fact my younger sisters are in the system because if I wasn’t born none of my parents issues would’ve happened. But cause I never really made friends I’ve never had the experiences others have had, never had a sleepover or a birthday party (not too bothered with that cause I don’t like birthdays) or people round for tea, never had a relationship until about 3 months ago, never kissed anyone never had the opportunity to drink. It makes me depressed and I’ve had multiple different forms of therapy but none of them worked. I wanna drink but cause I’m in a care home and not old enough to purchase it I cant, and I’ve got no way to get it, but I know it’s the only thing that will calm my brain down enough so that I can start talking about my problems or how I feel. It also makes me so jealous because I hear all the stories of people drinking in my class at college and I’ve asked my partner if I could have one of theirs when they got quite a few from a family friend and they were saying things like I would but and so on and so forth. They know just how bad I want to at least have one, that’s all I’m asking for is one so I feel like I can fit in with something at least. I can’t ask a random on the street as I suffer with really bad anxiety and I’ve been in a really bad state of depression recently but I can’t talk to anyone because it quite simply doesn’t work. I don’t know if I’m in the right or wrong but quite frankly I don’t care. I’m just venting cause I don’t want to relapse again as I ruined a two week streak a couple of days ago. I just feel like I’m not a human I’m just a machine that looks like a human but can’t relate to anything they do and I hate it so much.

Our Towns Big Dam Problem [Part 1]
Do you know how some decisions in life just feel so right? Imagine a nice warm pizza right out of the oven. The pizza is covered in gooey cheese, warm meats, and whatever else will delight the eyes and nose so late into the night. So image, if you will, going out for just the briefest of seconds to enjoy the crisp feel of the fall air on your face. You come back to the apartment building that you, and appropriately 50 or 60 of your neighbors call home, only to find smoke billowing down the halls as you suddenly remember that you turned on the burner, and not the oven to preheat, and the smoke is from that pizza you left on the stove.
If you feel like burrowing down the deepest hole after reading that, just remember that you are not alone. In the last week, I have taken a job at a hydroelectric power station as an operator, which at the time felt like an easy no-brainer decision. The job description was nothing if not a little enticing. There was a hefty sign-on bonus, more money than even I thought I was worth, and housing courtesy of the Corps of Engineers, which consider the aforementioned fire above, I needed pretty badly.
My name is Kate Fugate, I am 24, and in so, so much, debt that I have moved to a small town in the northern Appalachia wilderness hoping to carve out a life here. The town is very small, having a few local stores primary consisting of convenience stores, gas stations, and dollar stores. The town is deeply forested and has recently had the honor of having this vast area be designated a National park. The houses are sandwiched into a sharp valley, consisting of a river, sprawling train tracks, and speckled with bridges of all makes and builds. If you were to come here at night, and I very much doubt you would be here at night, you might also take notice of the emergency room-slash-post office combination with twinkling neon lights. If you plan on staying here for very long, and once again, I doubt it, you should get to know the staff.
The main attraction, and the reason that I am christening this journal, is that as much as I would like to believe otherwise, this place is weird but we will get into that more a bit later. What should be the most prominent feature of the town, the dam, is actually not in town. It is about 15 miles upstream, hidden on an unmarked road nestled in a forgotten corner of the park. This fortress spans the length of the river from hill to hill, and is a huge concrete wall with an office building made of brick and a stunningly massive art -deco window spanning the two floors of this structure neatly tucked off the side like an after thought. There are massive, brilliant flood lights spanning the entire length of the dam and stretching pretty far upstream.
The concept is pretty simple, water goes in, spins turbines, and comes out on the other side, and creates the miracles that we all know and love: electricity. In addition, this place prevents flooding and is an all-around great place for serving the town as an early indicator for fires and other disasters. To make matters even more excruciatingly boring and downright fucking frustrating is that there no cell or internet connections to the dam or the cabin nearby that I get to call home. The formal answer I got back for this pile of fake manure is that the cell tower determined the population to “insignificant” to put a cell tower in this area, which I can almost buy. The sorry excuse for the internet is that the park service determines this spot too high of a national security threat and doesn’t want the risk of Russians destroying the place or something, this reasoning being absolutely shit if you ask me.
In order to still get a tiny shred of civilization, I have to climb a stairway to heaven itself up a fire tower, on a hill to get just enough Wi-Fi to keep some semblance of sanity. And let me tell you, my ass is burning, my tounge is dry, and my lungs are one iota from exploding from the effort, and it is worth it.
My first day here started off with my coworker, Sam, showing up two hours late for our designated meeting. He was dressed in bright white pants and a striped plunging v-neck tiger shirt and I would be lying if I didn’t say my first impression was trying to find a camera crew, because I was just certain that someone was trolling with me. He was average height, approximately 35, black hair, blue eyes, and very well groomed hair, and huge muscular arms and, all-in-all, gave off an energy that he thought he was a very pretty boy.
We shake hands, before he cocks his head and give me a quizzical look, “Hey I noticed on your paperwork, is your name actually —“
I cut him off hard and fast, “Yes, it is. My parents were a bit, well, downright eccentric, alright? Don’t use that name, don’t even remember it alright. Do me a favor and call me Kate, Katie if you prefer.”
He looks a bit taken aback and I feel a shred of remorse for the hostility, “Can do, may name is Samuel Carrington but Sam sounds more approachable if you wouldn’t mind using that.”
We take a quick tour of the facility going into the offices, him quickly pointing out the landlines, emergency switches, exits, ect. He goes over the more technical aspects of the job, but then stops right before going into the turbine room, looks me dead in the eye with more seriousness than I thought was possible.
“There are only a handful of rules you absolutely must follow:
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1. 1. Treat the equipment well, it is fucking EXPENSIVE and a lot of it is specialized. There is no hydroectric repair store just sitting around the corner.
2. 2. Do not leave the site. I am dead serious about this one. Do. Not. Leave. The. Site. The only time you can leave is if you have someone competent here. I am only here two days a week as I have other obligations with the government, as you know the rest is up to you until we can get more people here.
3. 3. Don‘t turn off the turbines for any reason. There are people downstream that stake their lives on the continual operation of this place.
4. 4. If, for whatever reason, this place can not operate due to exceptional circumstances, or can no longer contain the river you must activate the emergency system. In addition to letting out an alert, it allows for people to know in advance to get to higher ground. This is critical, we are the only thing preventing everyone downstream a brutal watery demise.“

We head continue the turbine room talk about more dull operating procedures and then stop by a small office space.
Sam stops and swings open the door which reveals all of a tiny efficiency apartment. “This is my room while I am here, if you need anything feel free to swing by.” He gives me a wink as I contemplate vomiting on his stupid gold tasseled shoes “We have a cabin for you since no other apartments exist and it was left furnished by my last guy.”
We walk a short gravel path uphill to a small old cabin with a porch. He swings open the door, leaving very little to the imagination. Bed and mattress, fridge, stove, fill nearly all the available space. Right smack in the middle of the table sits a pissed off mostly hairless cat, that jumps off the table gives us a hiss for good measure and runs off into the woods.
“Look, we can probably get rid of that if you want. I have no clue how it got in here, or hey, look at it this way! You already have a built in roommate! Feel free to decorate this place anyway you want, if you want I can go get us some food, and I can help you move in. Tomorrow I can go on a grocery run.”
I open the cabinet to find an assortment of canned oddities left over from the last occupant.
“No, that really won’t be necessary, but thank you so much for the offer.” I say trying to be nice. And then the thought occurred to me that this guy is being perhaps a bit too friendly. “Hey, is it alright if I have some, umm, well, overnight friends over? Very special female friends?” I asked trying to be subtle to see if that would discourage him.
“Well douse me in gasoline and toss me a match. Are you a lesbian? That is so freaking awesome! I love chicks too, how cool is that? I shoulda known what with the flannel and pickup truck.” He says, totally oblivious to my growing acceptance that this guy was mostly harmless, if not a touch stupid. Sam cracks open the fridge, and rapidly shuts it back, as a slightly warm pungent smell swaggers into the room. “Yeah, definitely gonna get some real groceries tomorrow.”
“Yep, that’s me, I’m a super lesbian.” I lie feeling like this statement may come back and haunt me. I turn on the kitchen facet as black water spills out.
Sam looks at it a little concerned, “Might want to let that run for a bit, if it doesn’t clear soon, I’ll look into having it fixed. But look, seriously, if you need any help at all, don’t hesitate to call. This place is pretty spooky and it is easy to get hurt or in trouble out here. I’ve only been here about 3 months and my last coworker got pretty messed up. I liked him pretty well and it is an easy, if not boring job but it can take a toll.” Sam stepped out on the porch shooting a slightly nervous look at the woods before looking back at me.
I waved him out, “It is alright, I’m fine, I can take care of myself. I will see you bright and early in the morning.” Sam nodded at me with me with a warm smile and made the short trek back to the dam.
Night swiftly fell, and I was clutching my stomach off loading the contents into the porcelain alter for a cruel sadistic god. I hadn’t checked the expiration date too closely before downing a can of beef tounge I had found in the cabinets, which in retrospect was such a fuckingly stupid move on my part. I stepped back into the main living area to see just a swift glint of metal, before listening to the “Crash” as my widow was busted in and a hand swiftly unlocked the door from the inside.
“Shit, this is real bad.” My brain thought. As my body tensed for a fight, in walked a figure in a green ranger uniform. The guy was 26-27, 5’11, light brown hair, green eyes, fair skin. He looked absolutely furious but satisfied.
“I got you now, you jackass arsonist.” He says, grabbed me by the arms and tossing me on a stuffed chair hard. I feel a flash of pain on my ass as I land. “Damn, I realllly hope that wasn’t a needle.” I think as jump back up. Now, he looked back at me with with sheer bewilderment in his eyes. “OH shit, oh shit, I am gonna die.” I feel dread sneak into me as scramble looking around.
I take up a knife from the counter and plunge it into his hand. He lets out a yelp and given me a kick to my already twisted stomach. ”This is it.” I think as I land on the ground, and take the chance to grab his leg while it is still in the air. I push forward as he stumbles backwards.
“Wait, but your not -“ he tries to slide out of the cabin but I pull down his socks and bite like a rabid dog, with all the energy I had. I taste a glint of metal. He starts really letting his lungs work now before coming to his senses again and grabs a fire extinguisher off the porch and hits me squarely with it. My vision swiftly faded to white after that.
My next memory has me coming back to consciousness in a hospital room. I am under a blanket with cows on it, and look over to see a shitty thin blue curtain with yellow ducks on it. As I try to piece back my memory, I hear a commotion on the other side of the curtain.
One female voice nearly splitting my ears says, “Are you a dumbass? You look like one to me dumbass. You obviously weren’t thinking, dumbass. God, what a dumbass.”
Another male voice joins in, ”A girl, you beat a harmless girl senseless. And the poor thing was starting the job at the power plant. If you weren’t in already in the hospital, I’d put here, but to be fair that would make Dr. Sanders work harder, and unlike you I actually like the guy.”
An older man wearing a white coat comes in about this time who I presume is the aforementioned individual, gives me the mouth zipping motion, a wink and walks to the other side of the curtain.
“Well, she’s dead. You may as well see your handiwork.” The old doctors says.
A younger voice pipes up, “B-B-But it was an accident. I didn’t mean-“
The curtain flies open to reveal two police officers, a short and slightly heavy male and a tall African American woman. Both looking ready to kill the park ranger in bed with his hand bandaged up. The young man looks at me absolutely horrified. I can’t help but let out a small snicker at the scene.
The white haired doctor cracks up at the look of pure indignation I shoot park ranger.
“She’ll be fine.” He says. The two officers looked a bit more at ease. Dr. Sander then goes on to say after sitting down on the edge of my bed, “You spooked us just a bit there, that one over there” he points to the park ranger, “sprayed you down with a fire extinguisher and caused some temporary asphyxiation.”
The guy piped up, “I am so so so sorry. My name is Reuben, call me Ben. I’m so sorry, I had you mistaken for someone else. I’ll make this up to you. I really really fucked this up. Please don’t hate me,” he says. He was genuine, I fully believed that.
“Glad you said, that Ben, because I’m pretty sure I need a door now. My name is Katie.” I went over and gave him a light smack to the back of the head.
Dr. Sanders gave a puzzled look and picked my chart off the bed, “Wait, isn’t your name -,”.
I stopped him, “Yep, it is, please for the love of all that is holy, just don’t.”
After that, the female officer who’s name I learned was Talia, dropped me back off at the dam the next morning. Sam who had only the vaguest of ideas of what had gone on that night was filled in by Talia of the rest of the details and she quickly leaves afterwards leaving a cloud trail in the gravel.
“Well,” Sam says “I guess this means your leaving.”
“Are you kidding?” I say, “I only just got here.”
Sam cracks a wide smile, “You’re in luck then, I forgot to show you something yesterday.”
We go into the dam, down into the basement under the water level under the turbine rooms. I gasp as I look into the room, it was beautiful. There was a massive window looking out underwater. I could swear for the slightest second though that a fish swam by, displaying three eyes, and a sharp row of teeth. I knew in that moment that this river holds terrible and dark secrets and I had not even dipped toe in them.
This is Katie, signing off, until next time.

Cw: Possible animal cruelty or general lack of care torwards animals
I’ve rewrote this post twice trying to keep it as short as possible but it’s a lot…and unhinged.
Basically, my dad got remarried to my SM about 2 years ago. Our relationship has been fine until she voluntarily came to get me from Texas. I never asked to do this, she just didn’t like me and my dad’s plan of switching cars earlier in the month as my car was having issues.
Basically, I just got out the Army through medical retirement after 9 years. It was traumatic, and due to toxic leadership and one of my SOs (who lived with me) not helping and the other two not living in the state, I did not have a savings nor other help to move. Luckily, I ended up finding a good job in DC and my dad was planning to let me use his RV until I could afford to get a place. The only problem was me getting to his house (in GA) as originally, I was going to stay in TX until I could find a job but few of my roller derby teammates/friends showed their true colors and fucked up my mental health and he could not get me as he already had other plans.
From the beginning, SM was very pushy about the trip insisting I should be ready to jump in the car and go as soon as she got there as she had “stuff to do” it was weird and me and my dad kept telling her it wasn’t reasonable, but we chalked it up to stress as she’s never behaved like that towards me before. She gets here and it was straight down hill from there.
Firstly, she knew I had recently got cats. They are essentially my ESAs for my trauma from the military. They only are not formally as I don’t have money to pay for the official paperwork now. SM neglected to tell me that not only does she hate/fear cats, but the person she brought to help drive is allergic. As such, she demanded I keep them in the carrier for the whole 20 hour trip(it’s a large multi cat carrier but they are also harness trained I have seatbelts for them), does not want to give me time to appropriately let them pee, had to be convinced by her friend to let me stop for litter as she had -against my direct instructions- put their litter box in an unreachable locations and refused to let me get it as it would “take to much time”, blamed me for her friends asthma attack when her pills wore off, and would not let me put the third seat down so the carrier would be properly balanced as she didn’t want her cooler to be in the bed of the truck. She also convinces me to get rid of some of my stuff (like just throw it away) as it would take too much time to load it and it took up too much room. This leads to a big argument after I had enough and she basically DARVOs me the entire time and says its fine if they just…piss in their carrier cause we can clean it up later (keep in mind this is not her truck, it’s been paid off for years before she was in the picture, and its my dads dream car). I’m yelling at her, and she just says she just wants me to “compromise”. I say I have, and asked what exactly SM has “compromised” and she says that her letting my cats in the truck at all was her compromise. She refuses to answer when me or her friend asked her directly the alternative was and yells it’s not her responsibility to come up with a solution. Her friend manages to calm us down, and finally make it to GA.
As soon as we get back, she is acting weird and ruder than during the trip. She refuses to give me my dads keys so I can make a copy (I have had a key since he bought the house but he got a new door knob), will not actually let me use my dads truck -despite that being agreed upon well in advance- to the point when my car needed a jump she chose to not jump it with his truck even though it was right next to me and instead drives her car closer to mine to jump it, and is generally pushing me to hurry up and get my stuff out of my dad’s truck/my car and put it in the RV. She also told me that my childhood dog, Blue, and hers are not allowed to free roam the house anymore, and that they are only allowed out of their area during certain points of the day. I’m perplexed but don’t say much and ask if they have leashes so I can take them on a walk at least. She says they aren’t the walking type and basically shoots down any idea I come up with spend time with them outside of just taking them in the front. I don’t like this idea because, I don’t know this new dog and I think she probably won’t listen to me. Because of this, and her rushing me to unpack so much, I tell her I’m going to take Blue upstairs so he can meet my cats and finish unpacking. She doesn’t like this Idea and says she thinks they’ll fight. I say I’m sure it will be fine as Blue is used to cats and my cats aren’t generally assholes. Note: she never said not to, and he is my dog so I thought it was fine.
Well, I guess between the stress of the trip and them not knowing this animal, I was wrong and Jean, one of my cats, swipes at Blue. Its just a surface cut but I’m distraught by this and go downstairs to ask for a med kit to clean it. I apologize a lot and am clearly shaken. SM decides this would be a good time to chastise me and tell me “None of this would have happened if you just listened and followed my rules”. I’m floored but say nothing a go to keep unpacking. Fast forward to later that night, this entire time, she refuses to give me my dad’s keys, locks both doors every time I leave, but gets frustrated when I have to knock or text her to open it (my dad typically leaves the door unlocked during the day as he knows all his neighbors so it was already weird) .
I ended up going to get some food and she isn’t home when I left or answering my messages so I figured she’s busy and leave the house. When I come back the door is locked and she isn’t answering the doorbell, so I text her. She answers the door, again annoyed, after her mom confirms the doorbell rang. I also am texting my SO in Texas at this time an accidentally text SM “this woman is mad she has to open the door for me but won’t give me a key”. Once I realize my mistake, I run downstairs to apologize, and she refuses to open the master bedroom door and is screaming at me through it. I try to talk to her, but she then says to go away as I’ve been talking to everyone behind her back and getting ppl against her. I have absolutely no idea what she’s talking about as, at this point, I’ve only told my dad pieces about the fight and that I felt uncomfortable to which we agreed not to tell her we talked til he got back and my SO in TX who she hasn’t met yet (I suspect she was listening to my earlier call as the door upstairs doesn’t fully close). She says other ridiculous stuff, I and decide its best for both of us if I left and went up to North Carolina as I was going to go visit anyway and come back when my dad gets back. I ask her for his flight info as he had asked me to pick him up. She doesn’t answer at all and eventually I get mad and say fine I guess he just won’t get picked up and go to pack.
She goes absolutely nuclear at this and starts screaming a me and tells me I need to go upstairs and go to bed. I tell her no and she point blank calls me a spoiled, manipulative, a liar, and a brat. She alludes very strongly that I’m like (emotionally abusive) mother until I tell her point blank to no speak on her as she’s met her once. She’s calling me all theses things with the justification of my dad doing stuff for me makes me spoiled and that I’m abusive to him and that I have him wrapped around his finger. She says I needs to ask her permission to leave the house for anything as I will always be a child in this house and can’t just come and go as I please and as such was mad that I left for food in the first place. There’re so many unhinged things she said in this fight, to the point that my friend had I called to ask stay with her wires me money just so I don’t have the added stress of doing a 3-hour trip at 11 at night and can be safe. She ends the convo with “Its late, and my voice is and I’m a singer (at their church) and can’t ruin my voice so I’m going to bed. You should do the same but if you choose to leave close the garage and go through the front”. I’m honestly angry and in shock but leave any way. She never texts me the entire 2 days to even see if I made it there despite being upset because she thought me leaving would make my dad mad at her and make her look bad, especially if my car broke down(which luckily didn’t happen but very much could have happened).
The day of his flight comes, and I make my way back to GA. My dad finally got cell signal and had to force her to tell me anything (turns out she refused to tell me because she didn’t know as my dad’s flight got moved). He insists this is just a misunderstanding and wants to have a group talk which goes horribly. She wouldn’t let me tell my side at all, deflects the whole time, and the I discover she told my dad she thought I was drunk during the road trip. After me and my dad talk to his best friend, I discover that his bestie has never liked her, told him not to marry her (including on his wedding day), that this woman has put my dad in debt, and my dad says point blank if not for her sick mom living in the house, he would have left her already. Dad also tells me that none of the rules she listed were legit and he never agreed to them. He then reveals that this behavior, while shocking and unhinged, is probably because he told her that her cousin was not allowed to use his truck without his permission and that I am still the primary recipient on his will for everything, including the house (I had no idea about this).
Needless to say, it’s a lot. He was visibly pissed for a few days and had me fake apologize just to see if her behavior toward me changed and when it did not barely spoke to her. Until… maybe a week in. She started acting friendlier towards me and he seems to be in a better mood. I know he said he had a plan but its hard to see them carrying on like normal with everything. SM goes on a trip on Friday, and I am torn between asking him what he plans to do and leaving him alone. I didn’t come here to ruin his marriage, I just needed help. But at the same time, I feel like her behavior was unforgivable. It especially hurts, because the stress was so much my dad and his friend convinced me to try to get my start date moved because I was visibly stressed and depressed only for my new job instead to rescind their offer. I’m at his house for a bit longer as he asked me to stay so we could spend time after she left, but after that I’m going up to NYC to be with my other partners and try to focus on myself. Keep in mind, all this, is the extremely shortened version.
I read this sub a lot but never thought I'd have anything to say in it, especially for anyone other than my actual mom. I’m at a loss on what to even do or what direction to steer my life in now that she effectively ruined my plan and new beginning.

My ex and I co-own a home in Fayetteville, GA. Bought in 2015 for $259k. Now estimated around $475k. We both poured money into the house 2015-2019 doing renovations and myself pouring labor into many projects. I moved out 3 years ago and am ready to request a divestment agreement in order to get my name off of the mortgage and deed.
She's lived in the house for 3 years now paying the mortgage and utilities. I've spent around $65k in cash and another $15k in personal renovation labor between 2015-2019 when we lived in the home together. She claims to have receipts north of $200k which include contractor invoices and mortgage payments.
If we get lawyers involved to partition the property because she won't agree to a sale (because she still lives in the house), what do I stand to gain or lose, aside from attorney/court fees? An attorney told her the house would be sold, equity and debt would be split 50/50, meaning I could actually owe her money somehow, after it's all said and done.
Is there a world where I don't come out of partition with debt, or are my only realistic options to get her to agree to a buyout or agree to sell the home?
If we straight up sell the home and split the equity 50/50, could she still request an equitable split given her higher debts against the home? I'm not interested in screwing her out of her fair share, but right now she thinks I shouldn't receive anything.
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I move back to Bremerton in two weeks, and currently hold an office job in Snohomish. I absolutely love this job, but I have to commute daily for work, and want to find something closer to home. 11 hours of work, plus 5 hrs of travel a day is grueling. 😅
I’ve been doing office work for nearly a full year, but, I also have experience in things like management, and sales (I also have a bunch of awards in sales too!) as well. I’m super detail oriented, and am a quick learner. I’m primarily just looking for an office job, as oddly enough, its a line of work I really enjoy.
My only issue is… I’m trying to find a place that will work with me based off of my appearance! I’ve been denied way too many times just for having bright hair and piercings, which is a huge bummer as I have plenty of references who can vouch for me and my work, as well as awards from previous employers to back myself up.
Just trying to find a place that will accept me based off my work, not my looks!
Does anyone have any recommendations on where to look? 🙂 ive been on indeed left and right, as well as LinkedIn, but I haven’t found too much! I’d love to stay in the same field of work, as I heavily excel in this field. I’m totally open to recommendations as well on other jobs to look into!
I tried posting this to the Kitsap Job Hunt group…. Aaaaand they denied it right off the bat. So I’m hoping that the nice folk here can shed some insight! 😅

First of all, I apologize for my post being so long. I didn’t want to leave anything out and this has been on my mind so I might’ve started to rant a bit. This is also my first time on Reddit so I’m sorry if this is the wrong place to post this.
For days I've been feeling super down about this subject. It's not the first time they have made me feel this way but it hasn't affected me this bad or for this long until now. I love my fiancés family as if they were my own and everyone has welcomed me with open arms and made me feel loved except for his parents. His grandparents are the sweetest people I have ever met and I absolutely adore them. I don't have a relationship with either of my grandparents so it feels like I finally have grandparents of my own and that means a lot to me. His uncle and aunts also make me feel welcomed even though one of his aunts is a bit shy and doesn't talk much. They all talk to me kindly and treat me like an equal - not just like the girl that happens to be dating their nephew or grandson. As for his parents, I have only felt accepted by them once and that was way over a year or two ago. Ever since, however, I feel like they get more and more distant from me and their attitude towards me seems to be getting worse. I'm so tired of their constant disrespect towards me and their passive aggressiveness that they know they can get away with because "they're older and I'm not their family so there's nothing I can do about it". I still try to show them respect not only because I'm the one dating their son, but because I was raised to respect my elders. At first, they would just ignore me when my fiancé left the room, then they started ignoring me in front of him but occasionally talking to me when my fiancé was able to bring me into the conversation, now, it feels like I'm not even in the room and when they decide to finally talk to me it either has to do with me explaining what something is (typically a Mexican dish), or to say something very passive aggressive. If my own fiancé even tries to bring me into the conversation, they just completely ignore the effort and keep avoiding me until they find some passive aggressive comment to direct towards me. I just feel like a bother when I'm around them. I feel guilty for being in their presence when I have done nothing to them. I try to always be respectful around them and I wish I knew what made them act this way towards me. Part of me thinks that they blame me for my fiancé not visiting them or speaking to them as often, however, when we started dating he was still in college with no job so he was able to visit them more often. Now, he has graduated college and has a full time job where he works 40+ hours a week and gets off late so even I get to only spend time with him a few hours a day before we go to sleep. He used to go to church every Sunday but now he works on Sundays and can't drive over an hour to go to church with them. It's not my fault that he can't visit them as often but I feel like they somehow blame me since he has slowly started seeing them less since he started dating me. Other than visiting them less since dating me, I have done nothing to upset them since I have shown them nothing but respect and have apologized to them if I did something wrong. The first (and to my knowledge, only time) I have made them upset was the first year we started dating when they invited me on a beach trip and I forgot to say goodbye (I was still living with my parents at the time and anyone with Hispanic parents know that if you still live under their roof you have to follow their rules and they wanted me back home earlier than expected). A few minutes after the incident I remembered I had forgotten to say goodbye and called my fiancé's mom to apologize and thank her for bringing me with them but later that day she told my fiancé how she was upset at me despite me calling her back immediately to apologize. This happened over three years ago and they were nice to me after that incident so I doubt that's what this is about. I'm also a very shy person who doesn't open up to people very easily, so I also wonder if me being so quiet is what turns them away from me. I don't think this justifies them being so passive aggressive towards me, but I have to keep this as an option just in case. Just to clarify, me being shy doesn't mean I completely ignore them and don't try to talk to them, it just means I still talk to them very formally (unlike the more casual way I talk to the rest of their family members) because they talk to me differently and more formally than everyone else in his family. I'm just matching their tone y'know.I feel like I'm getting a bit sidetracked but overall this bothers me so much because I feel so drained after seeing them. I sit there taking their attitude and there's nothing I can do about it because I don't want to be disrespectful or escalate things. It's so belittling and I broke down after having lunch with them in front of my fiancé because of it. He's stood up for me before but it makes his mom get very defensive over it. All he can do now is apologize for his parent's behavior but it doesn't stop them from making me feel this way. I don't want him to get involved because I feel like it would encourage the thought that I'm turning him against them. I see how much my parents love my fiancé and I wish his parents viewed me that same way. He's just as quiet and formal with my parents as I am with his but they absolutely adore him and ask about him when I'm on the phone with them. My dad even has a picture of us as his wallpaper and that makes me so happy. I want my relationship with his parents to improve but I feel like if I confront them or have my fiancé confront them about this they'll just get offended and make the situation worse. What should I do to confront them about this without offending them?

There's a grocery store right across the street from me, 0.2 miles away (3 minute walk, 1 minute drive).
When I'm at home, sometimes batches for this store show up where I can accept them, but sometimes I just see the store info and "batch in 5-15 minutes".
When it says that, I refresh the screen or sometimes restart the app, and for several minutes the "5-15 minutes" thing is still there, but eventually that store is no longer on the list at all.
I'm wondering why I see the batches become available sometimes but sometimes don't. Is it more likely that:

• while I wasn't on that screen, the batch became available and another shopper accepted it

-the batch became available but another shopper was in the store parking lot, so it showed up for them but not for me because they were closer
-no batch became available and the app was just completely guessing in the first place
-some other reason?
Thank you.

My daughter is six years old and has been in ballet since she was three. This is her third recital season that we have participated in (there are two seasons a year). My daughter ADORES ballet and loves her company and her teachers and friends. She even loves the front office staff!
Today we were getting ready for rehearsal. Rehearsal requires full makeup/bun in costume at the theatre no later than 5pm. We need to leave the house by 4:30pm to get there and park in the deck and walk to the theatre. At 4:15 she starts having an absolute meltdown. Screaming, crying, almost full on panic attack that she is “so ugly”. She screamed for a solid ten minutes that she’s “ugly ugly ugly”. Tears pouring down her face and just the look of utter anguish that she believes this. I manage to get her to let me hold her and rock her in the rocking chair. I talk to her in a calm voice and I told her that we don’t ever have to do recital again if it makes her feel bad about herself. She doesn’t have to quit ballet we just won’t do competitions and company dance if it makes her feel bad about herself. We should do things that make us feel good about ourselves. That sent her into another tailspin that now I don’t think she’s pretty enough. I tell her multiple times a day how beautiful and smart and vivacious and curious and strong willed she is and that I’m so proud and lucky to be her mama. We barely made it out the door and on time. Her hair was not quite what it should have been but I didn’t care. It’s rehearsal (I don’t understand the makeup being done but apparently it helps them feel comfortable in it).
How do I help build her confidence? She is the most beautiful precious soul ever. She can melt your heart with just a smile.
[just a few things I think will come up: I promote body positivity in my home. We do not talk negatively about anyone’s weight. We celebrate pounds gained for her because it means we’re getting big and strong. I NEVER weigh myself in front of her. I don’t diet but I do go to the gym almost daily but more for mental health. I wear makeup to work but not on my days off. She is allowed to play in my makeup and she even has her own makeup and vanity in her room. I try and let her have bodily autonomy where I can.]

Oh boy. Warning. This is long but this is also a long time coming, and I don't blame anyone reading for not believing someone can be so cruel to their own family but... here's the true story of my MIL from hell.
About seven years ago my Mrs, Alice (36F), and I (35M) rekindled a love lost in our teens, it was awesome and so easy. She had been engaged to some jerk for years and it fizzled out, he left her with a shit ton of debt and ended up costing her thousands.
Anyway, she moves back home to do some soul searching and I come moonwalking onto the scene.
Immediately Alice leaks all the details of her parents private discussions with her, she lets me know her parents consider me a rebound thing and dislike my lack of higher education and choice of profession, give us a couple months tops. Pretty fucking mean stuff, but I had no idea how bad it would one day become.
Three years later we move in together.
So we have our first big fight, Alice declares she actually has a problem with my lack of higher education too and I take it badly, we don't talk for two days and I come home from a twelve hour shift to find a note on my fridge.
It read like a lawyer had written it and I immediately knew it wasnt from Alice. In the note I was threatened with impending homelessness and promised that in the coming days the police would be called and told the car I drive has been stolen by me. This is due to the fact that the car's finance was in Alice's name.
I immediately drove to MIL's house and was told to leave. I drove home and expected Alice to return with intent to move out. She didn't. She apologised over and over, and I accepted her apology. She explained her mother had taken control of the situation and written the note, she didn't want things to end.
Fast forward a year or so. I'm enrolled in community college, with intent to go to University and we're home from the hospital with my newborn son, Archie. MIL has invited herself over to 'help us' for the first week of him being there; first day comes and goes and Ive done all the cooking and cleaning, MIL parks herself on the sofa and hasn't moved.
Second day and Alice asks if I'd be willing to give Archie a bath (against doctors orders) and I agree. Alice then asks my MIL to help me, I'm still on cloud 9 from the birth so idgaf and I agree.
We head upstairs and I run a shallow, warm bath for my son, part ways in and he pees during the bath, my first reaction is to leave the room to grab a towel from the bathroom, before I do I physically move my MIL's hand onto my son's leg and say "watch him, I need a towel".
I grab a towel in less than five seconds I'm back with my son. We wrap him up and she takes him back down whilst I happily tidy.
On my way back downstairs I pass my MIL who tells me she is off to bed. When I arrive in the lounge Alice is holding Archie in floods of tears. "My mum said you left him alone in the bath, he could've drowned!"
Fuck this noise.
I blow a fuse. I agressively shout for my MIL to get her lying ass downstairs. She doesn't come. I threaten to come up if she doesnt come down. She doesnt come. I begin up the stairs and she appears, crying, holding her suitcase and runs out the house into the pouring rain. She stands in the rain for nearly 90mins waiting to be picked up. Alice begs for me to get her indoors. I head out and ask her why she lied, I get no answer, just her crying her eyes out and insisting Alice is an abusive daughter who beat her up as a teen. I should've fucking known then and there what I was dealing with, but it gets worse.
Skip ahead to 2023. My son is 3 and my daughter is 1. My in-laws have moved to a different country across the continent and whilst we are by no means on good terms, I tolerate them.
Alice and I have the mother of all arguments and it ends with Alice becoming physically aggressive and manages to throw something at me. I react accordingly and make plans to leave. In the heat of the arguement Alice calls her mother who asks us both to calm down. We do and things are very difficult for a few days.
One morning I get told that Alice plans to take my children to see her parents abroad. We are broke so I immediately ask how, and I'm told she (MIL) has paid for all of their flights. Alice is ecstatic to be going and doesn't understand why I would be upset at not being invited.
A week or so later and I've managed to scrounge up the cash for tickets. I ask MIL if I'm welcome and she says yes.
Roughly three weeks ago (May of 2023) Alice tells me that her mother is not pleased I'm now joining them on the trip she she believes we 'Need a break' as a couple and sees this trip as a chance for her to consider permanently moving in with them. She has also contacted a lawyer and asked if
A. Is it possible to take my name off of the deed to the house as I have been in higher education and contributed considerably less money to mortgage payments than Alice.
and
B. Do Grandparents have any rights over that of fathers if said fathers are reported to be abusive.
Alice reassures me none of this is possible, but, incredibly, doesn't seem phased by these hideous attempts at ruining my life.
Fast forward to the trip. 7 days ago.
MIL meets us at the airport with and we drive to her house. Its a huge house, an absolutely beautiful mansion that has sadly been decimated by cats. The smell as I entered nearly made me sick. The floors are filthy, and the cats had completely covered the place in urine and its overpowering.
We are then told our bed has been used as a litter tray, the mattress is soaked in cat pee and on top of this the kitchen looks as if it hadnt been cleaned in months.
I'm polite enough to only divulge my disgust to Alice and even spend two hours cleaning the kitchen as a way of saying thanks for paying for the flights for my kids.
We head out in the car again and she shows us around her village, she strangely starts a 20min long speech about the local schools and job opportunities.. is she.. is she trying to convince us to live there? She then goes on to explain how she has been diagnosed with 'proper clinical depression' and begins to passive agressively explain how most people's depression is just a low mood and is 'nothing in comparison'. I should note that during my years at university I was diagnosed with depression, a fact she undoubtedly knew.
After more than I can stomach the MIL stops the car and declares she cannot drive down this particular road and must turn around. At which point she accidentally slams on the accelerator and drives head first into a brick wall. She all but totals the car and the wall is demolished, my kids are shook but fine, and I'm so fucking angry but I keep my cool. We limp home.
The first night in the house of many cats was unbearable. The heat and the stench had us gagging, I was pacing the room all night trying to figure out how to politely leave, but without any luck rearranging our flights.
Day two and we walk to a cafe for breakfast. I dont speak the local language and my MIL orders for us. My MIL reminds us she has recently had a gastric band fitted and I'am given an extremely small breakfast (one bread roll) filled with a meat I do not like but she werent to know so I eat it with sips of juice to help it go down.
Hours later we drive into the city, bear in mind the last time I ate a meal was in my home country, and Im famished after a small breakfast. We walk around the city for a couple hours and I ask if we can stop to eat.
My MIL rolls her eyes and throws her hands up in the air and this time I bite.
I explain how I haven't eaten a meal for going on 30+ hours and Im famished, my kids are hungry and I want something I know I'll at least enjoy. I wasnt overtly rude and I didnt blame anyone but I was clearly upset.
Back at the house and my fiance corners me "My mum said you attacked her, my Dad is furious, I said you didnt attack anyone but she is inconsolable".
I'm given ice cold treatment and ignored for most of the evening until later on and Alice and I are sat by the front door of the house, MIL walks up to the front door screaming to someone on speaker phone "I'm going to remind him who's house he's in if he thinks he is going to freeload off of us, I'm going to remind him who's food he is eating".
I look at Alice and just walk to our piss soaked room, defeated.
The next morning MIL has been told I overheard her and she has no intention of making any apologises. She hurls abuse about how childish I'am, how she has no time for drama and how she will not humour my attempts to bully her.
My FIL comes to me and asks me to reconsider my being upset, and insists the conversation I overheard was a misunderstanding. I let loose and explain it all - everything Ive explained here... and he immediately leaves the room and berates her.
She cries, plays victim, claims the whole family is ganging up on her and she goes to bed. That was four days ago. In those four days she has criticised Alices' weight constantly, threatened to hit my 3 yo if he misbehaves and insisted that my being 36 means my newly acquired degree is too little too late.
And so... Im still here, we've endured eachother for the sake of the kids, but I write this on the piss soaked mattress, miles from home, under the thumb of someone who I now understand is not mentally well at all.
We fly home tomorrow and out of hell, I can't wait, but I know this isnt the last I've seen of her.
TL;DR - MIL lies to S/O about me, threatens to ruin my life, report my car stolen, take my kids away, ridicules me, takes my family abroad and houses us in filth.

Hey everyone so this requires a lot of backstory to make sense, so please bear with me here.
I grew up with an abusive mother and a dad who either encouraged it or looked the other way. I am a college student and am working as a researcher for the summer with free on campus housing and pay, which meant I was only going to be home for about a week before moving back onto campus for research. Unfortunately for me, I was kicked out only after a few days home and with still a week before I could move back onto campus, so I essentially became homeless. I had to fight to get the clothes I was wearing, the phone I bought as backup for situations like this, and my computer. I found a place to stay for the week I couldn't be on campus but it was still stressful and still is because I've lost my family, home, and all my belongings. This is where the issue with my boyfriend comes in. We've been together for about a year, and we've had a lot of ups and downs in our relationship, mainly to do with the fact that I felt he did not make enough time for me. I am going to be completely open and honest and admit that I was pretty awful to him. While it is no excuse, growing up in a household like I did made it difficult to develop healthy ways of communicating, and more often than not my immediate reaction to being hurt (his seeming lack of care due to rarely speaking to me or spending time with me) is to usually get mad and lash out. I know this is not right, and I do not want to hurt him, let alone anyone, like that, so I have been working on myself at getting better at communicating and not lashing out like I had been. It hasn't been easy, and I'm not perfect, but I have been trying. I however, feel that he has not worked at all on giving me time, and I tried to be understanding about this as much as I could during the school year because I know he is very stressed (he is in a demanding major and has to keep his GPA up for scholarships and things). My communication about wanting more time with him was usually met with some version of "I can't I'm too busy", which upset me but ok fine whatever. Recently though, his classes ended shortly after mine, and I know (because he told me) he is working as a Paid intern in essentially a 9-5 job. Which to me, should mean he is less busy and would be able to (and want to) interact with me more. This was not the case at all. It took days after I had been kicked out of the house to get ahold of him and inform him of everything that had happened. After this, I would wait 12+ hrs for a response from him. I know that sometimes his phone acts up and doesn't work very well, but he has also communicated with me through snapchat or Instagram on his computer, and he didn't even bother to do that either. This lack of talking went on for 2 weeks, meaning I was moved onto campus and literally a 15 minute drive from him for a week with still next to no communication or anything. This obviously, upset me very much as I was going through a lot and he was supposed to be less busy now and he was still barely talking to me. In my upset, I essentially told him that I expected him to be more there for me in the difficult time I'm having, I didn't appreciate him being MIA, and that this wasn't the type of relationship I wanted and he could have a nice summer. He basically said that it wasn't intentional and his phone was acting up but he could've done better. I didn't respond because we've had this conversation so many times and he knows how I feel and he never fixes it so him saying that did nothing to change my mind. I would have given him a second chance if he started putting more effort into talking to me and actually making time for me, but that's the last he messaged me until the literal next day when he asked if I was taking calls, and said he had called me, when I hadn't received any calls. He essentially left it at that until 2 days later I called him. He picked up and sat there in silence for a whole minute before I gave up and hung up. He sent me a message asking why I called him to ignore him and hang up. When I told him I didn't hear him say anything, he said word for word "whatever. Not my fault you didn't hear me". Now, I don't see how else you could read that, but I took that as very sassy and like he couldn't give a shit about us talking or not. I blew up on him and told him I gave him so many chances, even after I had decided I was done I was still waiting for him to prove me wrong so I could give him a second chance, because I love him and if we can work things out I don't want to have the relationship end. I said something along the lines of "Anyone would think you don't want to be with me" and he responded with "Well, anyone would think I'm in an abusive relationship from how often I get kicked out and emotionally bounced around". For context, when he would be over to visit at my apartment and he'd do something that would upset me, I'd tell him to get out of my apartment, and once I calmed down enough I'd realize I didn't want him to go. Which yeah, I'm really lucky he put up with that and I should have never done that to him, but I felt that that wasn't the point of the conversation and said as much to him. We had already talked about that stuff and I've apologized and I'm working on it and I have been getting better, which even he agrees with. So I just felt it unnecessary to bring up a separate problem. I said to him "have I gotten a sorry? I'll work on it? Or anything other than a "you suck more?"" And he said he supposedly had wanted to say all these things over a call. At this point, I had to stop talking and go because, since I'm now homeless essentially and will be moving into an apartment, I needed furniture, and the university was trashing old furniture and I either needed to get it right then or not at all. He called twice while I was gone, and I was gone for a little over an hour. When I got back I tried calling him back, and I sent him a message saying to call me back. He has not spoken to me since then. He has not opened a single message on instagram or snapchat (I have an android so I don't know if he opened my texts). I'm honestly at a loss of what to do. I said before that if this can be salvaged I want to do that because l do love him and still want to work through things with him, and it seemed like that had been what he was willing to do right before I had to go, but now all of a sudden he isn't speaking to me. It's been almost two weeks and I'm scared he'll never talk to me again. I want to send him a big text just saying how I care about him and would like to talk to him but I don't know if I should or if he would even read it. He hasn't blocked or unadded me, he's just not opening or answering anything. Help????

I've been working at McDonalds now for around 9ish months.
Up until recently, I was in love with the job. It was certainly stressful, and if you asked me during a midday rush when I still had 5 hours left of my shift I'd have told you otherwise, but I left work everyday thinking 'I actually love my job.'
After coming back from a 7 day vacation a couple weeks ago, I just don't have that feeling anymore. I clock in, spend the entire shift slogging around feeling down and lethargic, and I clock out to feel relief that I'm finally away from the building - I don't get it, only a month before I'd be sorta looking forward to the next day.
Like today, I went for a smoke break. I never go for smoke breaks - never thought I needed to, but I just sat out there staring at the street yearning for the moment my manager says I can go home. Maybe it's because the feeling of 'going to work' and being self sufficient has ran out. All my coworkers today were just leaning about whilst I was trying to pump out orders, and when somebody on the other side of the kitchen broke a bag of shake mix open my manager hands me the mop and tells me to sort it out.
I do it, of course, because I value my job...meanwhile, the manager's locked away in their office and there's only a handful of us that are actually trying to clear our screens. I just don't get it.
I can't lie and I want this job, but yet again, there's no other option - if I want the money to get to college, I need this to work out for me. But I don't know how long I can keep clocking in and clocking out, feeling as if my shift has completely ruined my day.

Hi everyone -
I refer to my best man’s family as my own family. I call his mother “Momma (last name)”. I lived with their family for 3+ years while my parents were going through a nasty divorce from 16-18. When I came home from college I went to their house to stay. Hell when I had a traumatic head injury it was my best man’s family that stayed with me and helped me recover. I genuinely believe that if it were not for her I wouldn’t be who I am today. I wanted to honor her with a motheson dance. My fiancé thinks it is a great idea but we’re trying to be cognizant of my bio mom’s feelings here too. I am close with my bio mom as well.
My thought process is to do my bio mom/son dance, then the fathedaughter dance, then an additional “special dance with a very important person” for my second mom. We could always put the fathedaughter dance first. I think that’s the normal order. My fiancé doesn’t care. She just wants to make it as easy as possible. I don’t want the DJ to even call it a motheson dance. I told my bio mom that I want to do this and she didn’t shoot it down. So she’s aware that it is going to happen in some regard.
Has anyone seen anything like this at a wedding before? Does anyone have any song recommendations for this? I wanted to make sure that whatever song I choose for this doesn’t actually say “mom” or “mother” and isn’t too much about raising me just so we can have a differentiation line between the two dances. So far I have on a very short list:
“Extraordinary Magic” by Ben Rector or “Because You Loved Me” by Celine Dion
Thank you all for your help!